Promises, promises. Check this hand cuz I'm marvelous

rah-ful-mao BD

[11-11-08]

Remember a few months ago when I said I'd keep blogging at school? Well, apparently, it's impossible. Sure, I have free time but all of it is dedicated to homework and having a social life. So I apologize. Even though I still obsess over Google Reader, most of the articles I read pertain to the same topic[s] so ABSRD would be really boring and repetitive. So why am I bothering to update tonight? HELLO! I actually drew a comic! Sure there's no joke and I don't even really know what's going on in it but I drew it during English so it's good enough.

Plus, I'm in love with Keith Olbermann and I really thought I should share.

It's nice to have internet access

Hey everyone! I'm currently in Portland, OR. It's cloudy and cool and I absolutely love it. It doesn't feel at all like a city though. It is seriously lacking skyscrapers and a large body of water [rivers don't count]. I guess that's how I define a big city. I need a skyline. Anyways, I'm just popping in because I have internet access and to say that once I start things up again on the 29th, you might be a little confused. You'll ask, "Where are the comics? Where are the articles? What are these pictures of some weird little bear thing?" Well, here's the deal. I brought my bff Toby [he's a stuffed ewok I got at Disneyland over the summer] with me to Oregon. I'm photo-documenting his trip out here (1) because it's way easier to take pictures of him than of me and (2) he's super adorable and can model through anything! So starting September 29th I'll be posting the photo documentary in segments until we wind up at move-in day in Eugene. By that time I should be nice and settled and ready to get back to work on my comics and diligent news searches! Until then.

Love from the land of rain and granola,
Vashti

Goodbye Chicago, Hello PDX!

rah-ful-mao BD

[19-09-2008]

Hey hey! Just thought I'd let you readers [all 3 of you!] know that I won't be posting at all next week. I'm off to the land of rain and granola to finally get started at school. I move in on Thursday but I'm still gonna be pretty busy up through the weekend. I'll try to fit in a comic/post or two though. I should be back up and running on September 29th. Who knows, maybe by that time I'll actually decide to do more than just draw comics and comment on articles. Maybe I'll actually write posts of substance! I won't get my hopes up though. I have a bad habit of never following through with anything. Maybe if people actually gave me some feedback on here I'd be a little more encouarged to make the blog into something. If only.. ALSO. Since I won't be posting tomorrow, as you can see, I put a Music Note at the end. Have a nice week[end]!

A.B.S.R.D. [I Am waaay too lazy/Busy/Stressed to think of Real words for this Damn acronym]

- I think this quote pretty much sums up the entire article "The bane of the dinosaurologist's life is species that have been named on the basis of incomplete specimens." Yeah, dinosaurolgist is probs the best word ever regarding dinos. I lol'd. [@bbc]

- While I sometimes get a little uncomfortable being in things that are underwater [tunnels, the Finding Nemo submarine tour ride at Disneyland, etc.] I think this is really, really cool! If it were being built in the US I'd def go to it. A trip to Egypt is a bit too pricey for me. [@national geographic]

- I love a good story and so does everybody else. But why? Jeremy Hsu gives us some insight. [@scientific american]

- I'm pretty sure I'm not at all alone in wondering what it'd be like to die. Or, well, at least have a near-death experience. Is there really a bright light? Are you actually mentally aware of what's going on as your body is dying? What about out-of-body experiences? Southampton University is coordinating a three year study of 1,500 cardiac arrest survivors to see just what the body is capable of experiencing during these moments of near-death. [@bbc]

- Yesterday I posted a TEDtalk about the moral differences of republicans and democrats. Today I'm posting an article about the biological differences between the two parties. [@newsweek]

- Tanaids, isopods, worms. OH MY! Hundreds of new species have been discovered in the reefs of Australia. Ooh and there's a video. Rock on. [@national geographic]

- Yet another attack ad is being distributed by the McCain camp. This time Obama is a big, wasteful spender and is going to make us pay for things that won't affect us. Yeah, um, no. Nice try though. [@the new republic]

- This is really just for Scott, my favorite viking. xoxo ♥ ♥ ♥ [@msnbc]

- Ughhhh, this financial crisis - and the government's eagerness to bail out every company that faces bankruptcy - is going to kill taxpayers. Bad form Washington. Bad form. [@time]

Music Note
[introducing you to the songs that make me feel bad about my swagger]

Artist: T.I. feat. Kanye West, Jay Z, L'il Wayne, and M.I.A.
Song: Swagger Like Us
Album: Paper Trail


Lyrics:
(M.I.A. Sample) Hook Repeats 2x
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us

[Kanye West]

Mr. West is in the building
swagger on a hundred thousand, trillion
Ayo I know I got it first
I'm Christopher Columbus, y'all just the pilgrims
Thanksgiving do we even gotta question
Hermes Pastelle I pass the dressing
My attitude is tattooed
that means it's permanent, so I guess i should address it, huh?
My swagger is mick jagger
every time I breathe on the track I asthma attack it
Why he's so mad for, why he gotta have it
cuz I slaved my whole life, now I'm the master

Na-Na-Na, How it feel to wake up and be the shit and the urine Na-na-na-na-na
Trying to get that Kobe number, one over Jordan

(M.I.A. Sample)
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us

[Jay-Z]

cheaaa

No one on the corner gotta bop like this
can't wear skinny jeans cuz my knots don't fit
No one on the corner gotta pocket like this
so I rock Roc jeans cuz my knots so thick
You can learn how to dress just by
jocking my fresh
jocking jocking my fresh
jocking jocking my fresh
Follow my steps, it's the road to success
where the niggas know you thoro
and the girls say yes
But I can't teach you my swag
you can pay for school but you can't buy class
School of hard knocks I'm a grad
and that all-blue yankee is my graduation cap,
it's Hovaaaaa!!!
Dipping different rovers whipping with the soda
Hovaaaaa!!!
Could u even have any doubt after doubt if its over

(M.I.A. Sample)
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us

[Lil Wayne]

No one on the corner has swagger like moi, Church
but I'm too clean for these boys
I require what I desire I got stripes, A-di-das
Mami scream papi no mas
Run up in your shit just me no moss
Runnin this shit like I got four thighs
none has swagger like this four gods!
When it comes to styles I got several
sharper than a swagger, dagger all metal
And my jew-elz blue and yellow
the type of shit that make em call you Carmelo
Rules as follows stay true to the ghetto
write your name on the bullet make you feel special
Haaa!!!
What the f**k you boys talking about?
I know its us cuz we the only thing you talk about

(M.I.A. Sample)
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us
(and I'm done)
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us
(bye!)
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us

[T.I.]
yea

ha!

ya think?

thats right

You go see Weezy for the wordplay,
Jeezy for the birdplay,
Kanyeezy for diversity and me for controversy,
All my verses picture perfect and they meant to serve a purpose, you ain't living what you kicking and you worthless,
Looking from the surface it may seem that I got reason to be nervous then observe my work and see that my adversity was worth it,
Verses autobiographical, absolutely classical,
last thing I'm worried 'bout is what another rapper do,
Ain't nobody hot as me even if they rap they ass off blast off and have outstanding qualities,
Sell alotta records I respect and salute that,
but spitting real life on hot beats I'm the truth at

You kick it like me no exaggeration necessary,
living revolutionary, nothing less than legendary,

Gangsta shit hereditary, got it from my dad
flow colder than February with extraordinary swag

(M.I.A. Sample) Hook Repeats 2x (T.I. Adlibs)
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us
no one on the corner have swagger like us
swagger like us, swagger swagger like us

Getting ready for college is a bit more time consuming that I originally thought.

rah-ful-mao BD

[18-09-2008]

A.B.S.R.D. [Afternoon Blogs are Something Readers know how to Deal with] OR [only A Brief Sidenote for each Read Day because I have a lot of last minute packing to do]

- "Wall Street's Unraveling: How greed and fear collapsed the market's business model" [@newsweek]

- John Haidt explains what moral values republicans and democrats focus on and how that leads to party differences. [@TED]

- Biden is kind of like Cheney in the sense that they are nothing alike politically but both give voters reassurance in their respective presidential candidates. [@the new republic]

- Another look at the Democrats cave-in on off-shore drilling. Aka why our government doesn't know how to handle anything regarding energy. [@the new republic]

- Yesterday I asked how our country is supposed to be paying for the failures of privately-owned mega-companies. Well, Newsweek obvs heard me out and decided to give me an answer. Part of me wishes I hadn't asked.. [@newsweek]

- Guess what! John McCain invented the Blackberry, Al Gore invented the internet, and I invented the computer/telephone/electricity. Politicians need to give me more credit for their inventions. [@scientific american]

- Thank you Joe Klein for pointing out that the McCain camp is built on nothing but lies lies lies. [@time]

It's hump day already?

rah-ful-mao BD

[17-09-2008]

A.B.S.R.D. [I was Awake Before the Sun Rose for the Day]

- "Social networking is the new porn" Why just look at the hot people when I can socialize with them? And if it means less viruses on my computer, well, that's even better! This must be the reason I have membership on three different social networking sites.. [@msnbc]

- Our economy is basically ruining the world. Good job America. Sidenote: I like the title of the article. "As Wall Street tumbles, the world quakes." [@csmonitor]

- The Fed has decided to bail out AIG, giving them an $85 billion loan. Aren't we in serious debt already? I want to know how and why the US government is supposed to pay for the failures of privately owned mega-companies. This is all way over my head. [@nytimes]

- Hope is not lost for all financial institutions though. The new CEO of WaMu has a plan to keep the company from jumping on the bankruptcy bandwagon. [@msnbc]

- It looks like stem cells can do even more than we originally thought. Not only can they replace damaged cells, they can also save cells from being damaged. "The original idea is that you put cells in there and it would reconstruct the cells that died. … The beauty of this is there's not just one mechanism; they are acting in many different ways." [@scientific american]

- "Joe Biden, feminist: The Backslapping, Bloviating Hero of Women's Rights" Just another thing that Biden supports and Palin doesn't. A bit ironic, don't you think? [@the new republic]

- Whyyyyy are the Democrats supporting off-shore drilling? Oh, I guess this is why. What would I do without Rachel Maddow and the Talk Me Down segment of her show? Probs be super pissed instead of only somewhat pissed. [@time, @msnbc]

- I heard about this somewhere else earlier this week but this is the first article I've found on it. "Google's Search Goes Out to Sea." Google is moving their computers and whatnot into the ocean to be powered by wave technology and cooled by icy seawater. Um, so what happens in the event of a hurricane? [@nytimes]

It's secretly my someecard comic week.

rah-ful-mao BD

[16-09-2008]

A.B.S.R.D. [AM Blogging = poor Sleeping habits Reversed? Debatable]

- LOL, let's start this off slow and talk about math [can you tell that I'm in desperate need of getting back into a classroom?]! The Great Internet Mersenne Prime Search, GIMPS, recently produced the two latest [and greatest] prime numbers. I guess this is some sort of big deal? I have no idea. I can barely remember what 2+2 equals anymore. I really need school to start. [@scientific american]

- Al Gore is making the World Wide Web global! Oh wait. Not Al Gore. Sorry, I mean.. Tim Brenners-Lee? The [real] inventor of the internet has said that the World Wide Web Foundation will be working to bring the web to people everywhere who don't already have access to it. "The Web does not just connect machines, it connects people." Holla Web 2.0! [@scientific american]

- The stock market and our economy took a turn for the worst yesterday with the Lehman Brothers to declare bakruptcy and Merril Lynch being sold. The Dow fell 504 pts, the biggest drop since the market reopened after 9/11. Some are saying that while the economy is bad, it's not "catastrophic." Alan Greenspan begs to differ and frankly, so do I. Where's FDR when you need him? [@nytimes, @time, @youtube]

- "Strange 'ant from Mars' discovered" Before you go thinking that proof of life has actually been found on Mars [which may or may not have been my first reaction upon reading the headline], it was actually discovered on here on good ol' Earth. I found this news less exciting after I found that out. [@msnbc]

- "Forget about hockey moms and Paris Hilton--the financial collapse is a stark reminder of what actually matters in this election." It's articles like these that make me feel informed and intelligent after reading them. Thanks TNR! [@the new republic]

- I was pretty much done with this post until I saw this article linked on TNR. Really Sarah Palin, REALLY?? [@abcnews]

I'm disappointed by the lack of good articles over the weekend.

rah-ful-mao BD

[15-09-2008]

A.B.S.R.D. [Articles here were the Best from this weekend. Still Rather Disappointing]

-The LHC computer system at CERN was hacked last week by a group calling themselves 2600. The intrusion was intended to show weaknesses in the computer's defense system. Imagine if someone invaded the LHC and did funky things to it! Remember that black hole and destruction of the world thing that some people thought would happen when it was turned on? Yeah, I'm imagining something kind of like that. [@scientific american]

- It's becoming increasingly apparent that it is impossible for me to make a post without having at least one article about Sarah Palin. Today's article is about her duties [or lack there of] as mayor of Wasilla, a position that counts for the bulk of her executive experience. Let's just say this further solidifies my opinions of her and McCain since he's the one who made the risky move of making her VP. [@msnbc]

- NFL Update: I'm not gonna lie, I was a little torn watching the Bears game yesterday. I have my loyalties for the Bears and I'd never cheer against them but Jonathan Stewart [former running back for the Oregon Ducks] plays for the Carolina Panthers and he played an amazing game. It's not that I didn't cheer for the Bears [cuz obvs I did], I just also cheered for Jonathan Stewart.. [@msnbc]

- Ugh, I admit it. I watch Gossip Girl and I love it, thank you very much. Yes, I realize that shows like GG and 90210 aren't necessarily the best at showing how being rich isn't all fun and games. And yes, I realize that they give viewers unrealistic expectations. But I can't help but love escapist fantasy shows. Oh, and just for the record, I loved Veronica Mars. [@salon]

- You know what? I like Joe Biden. I think Obama made the right choice in picking him for VP. He did very well with his speech in Michigan. "Yes, this campaign is about change, but it’s about even more than that. It’s about what we value as a people. It’s not just about a job, it’s about dignity. It’s not just about a paycheck. It’s about pride. It’s not just about opportunity. It’s about respect. That’s why Barack and I are in this race." Obama/Biden '08! [@the new republic]

- I am so, so, SO glad that I don't fly United. $50 for a second bag is absolutely ridiculous. [@wall street journal]

- And finally, on the off chance that you didn't already know, Tina Fey returned to SNL for the season premiere to play Sarah Palin. She totally NAILED it. I'm basically in love with her. [@youtube]

Feel the techno beat shake your soul.

Music Note
[introducing you to the songs that shake my soul]

Artist: Giuseppe Ottaviani feat. Stephen Pickup
Song: No More Along
Album: N/A

11:30 is not Noon 30 and that's a good thing in my book.

rah-ful-mao BD

[12-09-2008]

A.B.S.R.D. [my number one feeling is Absurd aBsurd abSurd absuRd absurD]

- Oooh did you see, did you see? Gov. Sarah Palin had her very first teevee interview last night since McCain announced her VP! It was on ABC with Charlie Gibson. She danced circles around those questions! At one point I literally stood up and walked away laughing and shaking my head at the absurdity of it all [after I paused of course]. "I get lost in a blizzard of words there... Was that a yes?" Oh Charlie, you slay me! I can't wait to see her interview with Sean Hannity. I wonder if I'll be able to sit through its entirety.. [@time; @latimes; @the new republic; @youtube]

- Oil company conspiracy theorists everywhere were having [and probs still are] a field day when it was announced that US officials are under investigation for accepting bribes from oil companies. Hearing about corruption in Washington always makes me think of that one Simpsons episode ["Mr. Lisa Goes to Washington"] where Lisa talks about how the capitol was built on a swamp. Sidenote: why aren't there any clips of this on youtube?? [@time]

- I think more republicans should become Obamacans. [@salon]

- Reading about Fermilab and the amazing things that go on there make me feel bad for being one of the few people my age living in the Chicago suburbs to have never visited. If they end up proving there are other dimensions, I'll feel even worse. [@scientific american]

- I don't care if dinosaurs survived so long because of luck! If anything, that just makes them even more epic and awesome. Clearly, scientists have never read Ryan North's Dinosaur Comics. If they had, none of this would even matter. [@scientific american; @qwantz]

- So.. If the gay men have significant neurological similarities to straight women and lesbians have significant neurological similarities to straight men, then what about bisexual men and women? Riddle me that Jerome Goldstein/Ivanka Savic. [@salon]

Never Forget

The attacks on September 11, 2001 will never be forgotten.
Our hearts go out to those affected.
Today we remember.

It's another Noon 30 day and the only thing I'm behind on is this.

rah-ful-mao BD

[10-09-2008]

A.B.S.R.D. [A Big, Scary Raggedy Andy Dream]

- As a proud new bberry owner, I found this relevant to my interests. The one thing I miss most about my old razr is that it's a flip phone. I love flip phones because (1) if you don't have pockets or a bag, you can just easily put it on the waistband of your shorts/pants/whatever [def used this techinque a lot for places like disney and six flags] and (2) you can put them in your back pocket and not worry about pressing 5 million buttons. While I love my bberry curve, I'm really afraid I'm gonna break it if I put it in my back pocket which is a total bummer cuz where else am I gonna store it?? [@msnbc]

- If for some reason you haven't heard/seen, facebook got a facelift. The new format that's been around for about a month and a half now is supposedly becoming permanent some time today. I was in the first wave of users introduced to the new format and I've been using it since late July. At first I was VERY opposed to the new layout [re: 1-800-INTERNET] but I'm pretty much used to it now. I still have some complaints but it looks like we're all just gonna have to deal. [@msnbc; @rah-ful-mao]

- Good news! Yesterday the LHC [Large Hadron Collider] was turned on and there was no blackhole and we didn't die. Success! For those of you who don't know what the LHC is, it's a proton accelerator at CERN that can collide proton beams at nearly the speed of light. It'll be used to simulate and study the conditions of the moment after the Big Bang. [@national geographic; @scientific american]

- The only people I know who still use AOL are my parents and really that's only because they still use their AOL email as their primary email. Granted, I have to go to aol.com to check my AIM email too. But still, I don't see why aol.com is updating the page to include other email providers. You can't teach an old dog new tricks. I'd say this is lol-worthy but I pity the ancient internet provider more than anything.. [@nytimes]

- Oof. The GOP is at it again. According to Jane Swift, Obama called Palin a pig and McCain a fish in his speech in Lebanon, VA and the McCain campaign is expecting an apology. I guess they've never heard the phrase "You can put lipstick on a pig but it's still a pig" before even though I'm pretty sure one of their own has used it. Hmmm. This time, instead of my mind exploding, my head can't stop shaking at their silliness. [@the new republic; @youtube]

- OMFG, if you aren't friends with me on facebook or twitter [which is highly unlikely cuz I know where all my traffic comes from.], then I need to tell you: I REALLY, REALLY WANT TO GO TO SAN FRANCISCO LOVEFEST! I don't care if it's the first weekend after school starts. I don't care if it's the same day as the Oregon v. USC game. I want to go to SF and party in the streets during the day and then go to the Bill Graham Civic Auditorium for the afterparty that night. I love techno. I love dancing. I love people. So OBVS I'd love LoveFest. [@sflovefest]

I woke up at Noon 30 and I'm way behind on EVERYTHING.

rah-ful-mao BD
[09-09-2008]

A.B.S.R.D. [A Bunch of Supposedly Random Dailies]

- I love JK Rowling. She sure showed Steven Vander Ark who's boss. Hint: She is. She's the boss. Did I already mention that I love her? Cuz I do. Her and her amazing book series. [@nytimes]

- Hell yeah! Illinois is awesome. We're home to the largest fossil forests ever. Take that world! [@bbc]

- On one hand, the fact that we now have life that can "withstand the vacuum and radiation of space" without a space suit is really cool. On the other hand, water bears creep me out. A lot. [@nature]

- If you think this is cool, I highly recommend reading Crashing Through: A True Story of Risk, Adventure, and the Man Who Dared to See by Robert Kurson. The subtitle says it all. [@nature; @amazon]

- More colleges need to do this. Specifically, University of Oregon needs to do this since their financial aid sucks and I'd like to graduate without having a disgusting amount of debt. [@time]

- Ok, so what does it mean if I didn't really see those things as columns vs. background in the first place? I was under the impression that everything was on the same level. My visual system is mind-boggling! [@cognitive daily]

- Apple revealed their new iPod nano designs today. These things are gonna break in pockets around the world! [@bbc]

- US Open Update: I love Roger. I love tennis. I love the world. Federer beat Andy Murray and his ugly half beard that probs eats small British children yesterday in straight sets for his 5th consecutive US Open title. Everything is finally the way it should be. [@msnbc; @nytimes]

By blogging, I am successfully able to avoid packing.

rah-ful-mao BD

[08-09-2008]

If you didn't notice, I had a post this weekend. It's going to be a weekly post that I do on either Saturday or Sunday [depending on when I have the time]. Clearly, it lacks any substance but I'm okay with that. The point of "Music Note" is to introduce you to songs that I enjoy that you may or may not know. I'm trying to expand your music knowledge in a brief note! [See what I did there? That's what I do.]

A.B.S.R.D. [A Bright and Shiny Reading Day]

- I'd want to be a firefighter just so I could play with the FIT-5. [@scientific american]

- Ok, when I first saw the video, I thought for sure that this frog is one of those that gets filmed all the time and that people like my dad have as the background on their phones. BUT what do I know? I'm not Andrew Gray and I'm not the one filming the Red-Eye Stream Frog of Costa Rica for the very first time. [@bbc]

- I'm having a major "Well, DUH" moment with BBC right now. "Beatles' tunes aid memory recall." Well, DUH. How 'bout music in general aides memory recall? Ryan North is already way ahead of you guys. [@bbc; @qwantz]

- US Open Update: Andy Murray BEAT NADAL?!!? He'll be facing my love Roger Federer today. Also, Serena Williams won the US Open title yesterday playing against the Serbian I don't really care about, Jelena Jankovic. [@nytimes; @bbc]

- NFL Update: I watch football because I'm from Chicago and it's in my blood. So of course I was thrilled last night when Da Bears beat the Colts in a Super Bowl XXXXI rematch. But speaking of teams who lost in the Super Bowl, it looks like Tom Brady of the New England Patriots will be out for the season due to a left knee injury yesterday in the game against the Kansas City Chiefs. [@msnbc; @salon]

- The McCain campaign is finally letting Gov. Sarah Palin do an interview! It's going to air on ABC sometime later this week. Obvs, I can't wait and will be watching it while taking diligent mental notes. Personally, I think it would be more entertaining if they let MSNBC interview her but I'm not gonna complain. [@msnbc]

- Since we're on the subject of MSNBC, Rachel Maddow's show premieres tonight. I'll try my best to watch it cuz I heart Rachel Maddow and I think it will be great. It'd be really nice if I could figure out what MSNBC's HD channel is though.. Also, lol at the first sentence of the article. [@time]

- Lance Armstrong is pulling a Brett Favre [without the difficulty and stupidity that surrounded that drama]. The 7-time Tour de France champ will be coming out of retirement and racing next year. [@msnbc]

I got out of the house today. Holla?

Music Note
[introducing you to the songs stuck in my head]

Artist: Metric
Song: Dead Disco
Album: Old World Underground, Where Are You Now?

Lyrics:
Skip town. slow down
push it to the east coast
Step down turn around
push it to the west
Need less, use less
we’re asking for too much I guess
Cause all we get is…

Dead disco
Dead funk
Dead rock and roll
Remodel
Everything has been done
La la la la la la la la la la

Dead disco
Dead funk
Dead rock and roll
Remodel
Everything has been done
La la la la la la la la la la

Tits out, pants down
Overnight to London
Touch down, look around
Everyone’s the same
World wide, air tight
No one’s got a face left to blame
And all we get is…

Dead disco
Dead funk
Dead rock and roll
Remodel
Everything has been done
La la la la la la la la la la

Dead disco
Dead funk
Dead rock and roll
Remodel
Everything has been done
La la la la la la la la la la

I know, I know you tried to change things
I know, I know you tried to change
I know, I know you tried to change things
I know you tried to change
I know

Let's finish the week on a lighter, happier note.

rah-ful-mao BD

[05-09-2008]

Before I get started, I'd like to apologize for the nega-fest my blog has been for the past few days. I have a tendency to get heated about politics I don't agree with [not so much with those I do agree with though]. Anyways, I should be way more relaxed now that the RNC is over.

A.B.S.R.D. [A Blogger Should Relax and Deal]

- While I think it's a nice concept, I don't see the practicality of video cell phone for the hearing-impaired. Before I upset anyone I just want to point out that if you hold it in one hand that limits signing ability. Also, they suggest placing it on a steady surface but that sort of takes away from the mobility of a cell phone in general. [@scientific american]

- Now, money adapted for the blind? See [haha, get it? SEE?], that is actually practical. Props to Judge Robertson for insisting this be done. Personally, I like the idea of raised numbers because different sized bills would be a hassle. [@time]

- I am such a nerd. I love TEDtalks. I "learn" a lot and laugh a bit along the way. If you have half an hour to kill, watch Pete Hirshberg talk about how the web and web 2.0 trumps teevee. If you don't want to watch 30 mins of nerdy comedy gold just skip to 25:00 where he actually gets to his point. [@ted]

- I think HP needs to take a lesson from Sony and recall the HP Pavillion dv9000. My screen cover already cracked once from overheating! [@wall street journal]

- Much like Joe Biden, I really like the idea of clean coal factories. Apparently, so does Germany. Why is everybody but the US actually doing something to help out the with the environment? [@scientific american]

- Memories have always intrigued me and now we're finally figuring out where they come from. This is really fascinating.[@nytimes]

- When I see or hear anything about breast cancer or mammograms, I just remember sitting in the auditorium at school and having to feel up three fake boobs that were either clear, had a cyst or had a tumor. This seems like a much more reliable technique. [@time]

- Last night concluded the Republican National Convention. Unfortunately, I missed John McCain's acceptance speech because I had no idea when it was and by the time I found out he was already half way through it. So instead I just read the notes on it from the TNR blogs. I'll end up watching it on youtube when I have time. The thing's an hour long! Geez![@tnr; @youtube: GOPconvention2008]

- US Open Update: I'll make this brief. The other mens semi match will be between my love Roger Federer and that Serbian I don't like Novak Djokovic. [@bbc]

Today's comic is brought to you by 1997 because last night made my head explode.

rah-ful-mao
[xx-xx-1997]
This is pretty much how I felt after watching the RNC.

A.B.S.R.D. [Absolute Bullshit is being Spread at the RNC Damnit]

- So, yeah. I watched the Republican National Convention last night to watch Gov. Sarah Palin of Alaska, age 44, speak. Between her and Rudy Giuliani, my head exploded approximately 2340980 times and my heart and stomach ached. Everything they said was either extremely disrespectful, exaggerated, or a flat out LIE. I was disgusted not because of what they said necessarily but because of their delivery. I just don't understand how someone can sit there and allow them to behave like bitter children. I find it completely unprofessional and don't believe that these are the people who should run our country. [@youtube: GOPconvention2008]

- There were a number of things I did last night to cool off a little. (1) I vented to my friends, (2) I read every blog post at The New Republic concerning Palin's speech and (3) I watched Sara Benincasa's Palin vlogs over and over again. I'd say they all worked out pretty well. [@tnr; @que sera sara; @youtube: SaraBenincasa]

- US Open Update: I know I said I quit womens tennis BUT I just can't help it. Any tennis is good tennis. That being said here's the line-up for the semis: Dinara Safina v. Serena Williams and Elena Dementiava v. Jelena Jankovic. On the men's side so far: Rafael Nadal v. Andy Murray. [@nytimes; @time; @bbc]

- "Hurricanes are getting fiercer" and global warming is to blame. Or is it? There's no denying that we have a lot more for storms to destroy nowadays. However, while there is more for storms to wreck, the fact of the matter is that the storms are stronger now than they used to be. I just thought it was intersting to see both of these articles within 30 mins. [@nature; @time]

- Archeologists may have found the oldest skeletons in the Americas in an underwater cave in Mexico. If the carbon-dating is accurate, this discovery may lead to a new theory of how the Americas were populated. [@national geographic]

- Speaking of old findings, the oldest gecko fossil has also been found! It's said to be around a hundred million years old. [@national geographic]

- This just makes me LOL. "Cross-dressing thief leaves fake breast behind" MSNBC sure has some quality headlines. [@msnbc]

- I may be guilty of loving a show that originated in the UK but I've been noticing a huge increase in foreign programming recently. Why don't American television producers know how to make quality original programming? [@salon]

I can't draw horses. I also can't draw dogs so there went my back up plan.

rah-ful-mao BD

[03-09-2008]

A.B.S.R.D. [A Better Solution to Rainy Days: part two]

- I've always just assumed that peaceful protests aren't really all that peaceful. Obvs, I've yet to be proven wrong. It's kind of a shame that the ice sculpture they carved melted by the time the GOP big hitters got there. Guys, it isn't *always* cold in Minnesota. [@time]

- While doctors are still unsure that hypothermia treatment was the key component to former Buffalo Bills player Kevin Everett's parlysis recovery, the fact of the matter is that he's able to walk and that alone is simply amazing. [@scientific american]

- Apparently SciAm is all about football this week. Well, that's just fine with me because they finally answered a question I've had since last season: "What is turf toe?" [@scientific american]

- US Open Update: I'll make this brief because other than Roger Federer's nail-biting victory over Igor Andreev, I could care less about Dementieva moving into the semis or Djokovic narrowly beating Tommy Robredo [a match that I'm not too happy about]. I want my Serbians back. [@bbc; @nytimes; @nytimes]

- I don't care what anyone thinks - I own a Zune [well, technically owned.. mine was stolen a few weeks ago] and I'm proud of it. I used to own an ipod so it's not like I haven't checked out the competition. It's nice to know that someone else at least thinks about us Zune loyals. [@nytimes]

- After yesterday's post I was hoping to stay away from anything Sarah Palin BUT she's speaking at the RNC tonight so obvs I need to talk about her. This will most likely be make or break for Palin to show what kind of politician and potential veep/pres she will be. I'll save my comments for tomorrow. For now, this is what she'll need to do. [@the new republic]

Tuesdays were never meant to be Mondays.

rah-ful-mao BD

[02-09-2008]

Alright. A.B.S.R.D. is going to be a bit massive today because I didn't get around to making that weekend post I said I'd do. So to make it a little more organized, it's going to be separated into two sections: (1) All 'Bout Silly Republicans Day and (2) All 'Bout Stuff not concerning Republicans Day.


A.B.S.R.D. - The Sarah Palin Edition.

- When John McCain announced that Palin would be his running mate, my first reactions were "Who the hell is Sarah Palin??" and "The only reason he picked her is because she's a woman." I believe Joe Conason put it perfectly when he said that "Palin is the epitome of tokenism... she possesses the only two qualities that McCain now seems to consider essential: She is a right-wing religious ideologue with female gender characteristics." [@salon]

- For McCain to think he can gain the women vote just because of Palin is a complete and utter joke. I cannot express how infuriating this is for me. "How insulting, how condescending, how downright patronizing of Senator McCain to attempt such ham-fisted identity politics." Sarah Palin will not attract the votes of Hillary supporters and to think otherwise is simply foolish. [@the new republic]

- Another issue concerning Palin is her experience -or rather lack there of. As mayor of Wasilla, AK [pop. 5000+ in 1996] Palin was injecting major politcal issues and partisanship into a small-town local government. During the race, she was ruthless and beyond aggressive towards her opponent and anyone else who disagreed with her; a mindset that continued throughout her time in office. This is almost as bad as internet fights. Someone really should've told her to take a chill pill cuz that's what they said in the 90s. Then again, that may be a bit of a generalization of the decade. [@time]

- "What does a VP do anyway?" Well, for starters, a vice president is second in command. Americans need to be confident that the veep will be able to run this country if the president is unable to fulfill his or her duties. In this day and age, that person needs to be able to handle not only national issues but foreign relations as well. We see Joe Biden with 36 years of experience in both of those arenas whereas Sarah Palin has limited experience in state politics. But then again, she's from Alaska which is right by Russia so obvs she has international experience.. ? [@youtube; @the new republic; @youtube]

- While in my opinion, family matters are private and have no right to be exploited, I did find the news of Palin's 17 year old daughter's pregnancy lol-worthy. Of course she'll be marrying the father à la Jamie Lynn Spears. [@bbc]

- Let's not forget that there's is another name on the ballot in November - John McCain. In the beginning, there were a lot of center/center-left people who didn't have a big problem with McCain, he was a respectable guy. However, with the election only a few months away, John McCain has become a joke who's running "the most sarcastic presidential campaign ever." [@the new republic]

- And finally, it's time we address the Republican National Convention taking place in St. Paul, Minnesota. Honestly? The first day was pretty uneventful. Well, with the exception of the baby bomb. [@newsweek; @time]


A.B.S.R.D. - The Rest of the World Edition.

- Google's launching a new web browser called Google Chrome today! It seems pretty cool. I'll probably end up downloading it some time today to check it out. I'll let you know how it goes. [@bbc]

- We, as a country, expect so much of our president. We expect inspiration, leadership, and an answer to every problem that arises. Our view of the presidency has changed greatly over the past 200+ years; from simply upholding democracy and the Constitution to embodying and protecting the soul of our nation.[@csmonitor]

- With high gas prices and global warming, people everywhere are looking for better alternatives for transportation. [Re-]Introduce the electric car. Past models haven't really been all that we want or "need" them to be. Batteries drain fast and there isn't much power or speed involved. We're already working on the power/speed problem but what about the batteries? Shai Agassi seems to have found a pretty good answer. [@the new republic]

- Chris Jordan is quickly becoming an awesome person in my book. He's an artist who specializes in "giant photo collages." They aren't your typical collage though. They give you a visual idea of the [environmental] statistical data of our over consumption of products. You can look at his work here. [@the new republic; @chrisjordan.com]

I should invest in a dictionary comprised solely of words beginning with the letters a, b, s, r, and d

rah-ful-mao BD
[29-08-2008]

A.B.S.R.D [Alright, Barack's Speech was RIGHTEOUS at DNC]

- Last night in Denver, CO, Senator Barack Obama [IL] accepted the nomination as the democratic presidential candidate. His speech was awe-inspiring and gave us hope for a better tomorrow. Basically, he made me want to jump up and down shouting things like "U-S-A! U-S-A!" and "YES, WE CAN!!" If you missed it, you can watch the speech here. It is definitely worth your time. [@cosmic variance;@youtube]

- On the other side of the political spectrum, John McCain announced Governor Sarah Palin of Alaska as his running mate. My first thoughts? This election is getting ridiculous. Obvs he chose her to get the woman vote. I highly doubt any Hillary supporters will agree with a thing she has to say though. [@nytimes]

- US Open Update: I hereby quit womens tennis. The only person I ever really pay attention to is Ana Ivanovic [looove] and now she's out of the tourney. I feel as if I'm just setting myself up for disappointment at every grand slam [besides Roland Garros]. Also, Janko Tipsarevic [looove] retired yesterday during the middle of his match? Serbian tennis players are really tearing me apart right now. [@nytimes]

- US Open Story: I have an odd fascination with the ball boys and ball girls at grand slam tournaments. Ever since I saw the almost robotic precision of the young ball children at the French Open, I've had a dream to start a montessori pre-school to train the little ones. So when I saw this headline about a spectacular ball "girl" [she's actually 24] I got all giddy and reveled in reading the personal story behind Kelly Bruno. [@nytimes]

- Voluntary Advertisement: Vote for Marie Lyn Bernard [this girl called automatic win] at HotBloggerCalendar.com! Riese '08!!


[I'll be doing an A.B.S.R.D. post sometime this weekend because I have a lot of articles starred on Google Reader that I've been dying to use.]

Come on! You've got to build your brain bigger for the memories!

rah-ful-mao BD
[28-08-2008]

A.B.S.R.D. [A Better Solution to Rainy Days]

- US Open Update: I'll admit I'm not a *huge* fan of Jelena Jankovic [Hello, I have two other Serbians to la-la-love] but I'd expect better game play from her. Way to pull an Ivanovic? It also seems as though Novak "The Joke[r]" Djokovic is doing well [as was expected] despite being treated for an injury during his match against Arnaud Clement. Why am I talking about the Serbians I don't cheer for? Where's Ana Ivanovic? Better yet, where's Janko Tipsarevic??! [@bbc]

- Highlights from Day Three of the DNC: Barack Obama officially wins the Democratic Presidential Nomination, Joe Biden accepts the VP nomination, and Former President Bill Clinton speaks to further unify the party and support Obama's presidential campaign. [@wall street journal]

- "Don't just do something, sit there." An interesting piece on the importance/power of noticing. [@aiga]

- They better put my wisdom teeth to good use once I get them pulled if they have to ability to produce stem cells without the controversy. [@national geographic]

- I.. um, wow. A movie about facebook? Really Aaron Sorkin, really? [@bbc]

Chicken Monkey Shoes?

rah-ful-mao BD
[27-08-2008]

A.B.S.R.D. [Always Busy with Some Reading Delicacies]

- This made me literally lol while I was reading it. Dogs are the perfect solution for any and every drawing related problem! [@kottke]

- I may not like Internet Explorer [Holla Firefox!] but I love how their new "InPrivate Browsing" feature is OBVS for those who don't want to leave traces of their porn viewing behind. xD [@nytimes]

- Scientists from the University of St. Andrews [UK] have discovered a molecule that could explain the emergence of life. "This shows that you can bring order from chaos." [@nature]

- If they can make it easily accessible for those who really need it, the Robo-skeleton could replace the wheelchair [at least for the paraylzed]. This really is quite an invention. [@bbc]

- As you know [well, assuming you're American and not living under a rock] the Democratic National Convention is well under way in Denver, CO. Last night, Senator Hillary Clinton [NY] spoke in an attempt to unify the party against John McCain and to support Barack Obama. You can watch her speech here. [@salon; @nytimes; @youtube]

- US Open update: Ana Ivanovic needs to NOT scare me like that ever again. It was bad enough watching her struggle at Wimbledon and then pulling out of the Olympics. I love you Ana but sometimes I swear you're gonna give me a heart attack. On the flipside, my other tennis love, Roger Federer, played fabulously, taking only 82 minutes to finish off Maximo Gonzalez with set scores of 6-3 6-0 6-3. [@bbc]

- ALSO! Auto-winners had an advanced screening of my comic late last night. Many thanks go to Marie Lyn Bernard aka this girl called automatic win. Her writing is wonderful and fills me with joy late at night/early in the morning. Obvs this means that you should check out her blog! [@autowin]

"Sorry about your dress" is the new "Your mom"/"In bed"

rah-ful-mao BD
26-08-2008

OK. So. I feel this comic, coupled with the title, needs a bit of explaining. The use of "sorry about your dress" originates from a FAIL picture floating around the interwebs. Though it has yet to hit mainstream vocab, this little gem is rising in popularity [granted, rising in popularity strictly amongst my friends..] so I figured I should share with all of you. When do you use it? Well, besides after anyone [including yourself] says "too late", it can pretty much be used in any sort of awkward situation or when someone say "too [insert word here]". Don't believe me? Just try it out. It'll be a big success! I all but guarantee it. =]

A.B.S.R.D. [A Bit of Stellar Reads and Delights]

- I can use cows as compasses? Great! Now I don't have to shell out $500 on that GPS system. [@scientific american]

- This may be the most innovative camera design I've ever seen. Sure, it's not the most sophisticated camera, but that's not the point. Finally, children are able to truly capture the world around them. [@TED]

- U.S. Open update: I was NOT expecting to see this kind of play from Nadal. Where's the complete domination we're so used to? And James Blake? Oh James Blake.. [@bbc]

- Government enforced discrimination sickens me. I find it appaling that the people of Arkansas voted to get this on the ballot. [@time]

- The more I read about Joe Biden, the more comfortable I feel voting for him. I'm intrigued by this whole clean coal idea. [@scientific american]

- Anyone interested in trekking across the South Pole? These guys are looking for a last crew memeber! [@bbc]

- I'm really starting to like NPR's This I Believe. Here's an essay from the VP at Nike, Howard White, speaking about "The Power of 'Hello'" [@npr]

- I feel like such a nerd but I think this is really cool. Holla at Nobel Prize winning physicists! [@cosmic variance]

Back to the grind

rah-ful-mao BD
[25-08-2008]

So before I get to A.B.S.R.D. I'd like to share with you just how productive my weekend was! It consisted of painting, biking, and sitting at the computer. Holla! BUT. While sitting at the computer I actually got something done: I designed a killer t-shirt and put it up on zazzle.com. This means people can buy my awesome shirt and I get some cash flow! The shirt itself is called "Dinobot Attack" and it features the dinosaur and robot from my e-party comic. This time, instead of partying, the two are destroying the city and fighting off an angry red helicopter. Which reminds me that, YES, the design is in COLOR. The robot is a colorful mess. =]

You can check out the shirt here: http://zazzle.com/rahfulmao
[As you can see, I also have my "I Love Bears" shirt up for sale too. Perfect for those of you who like Man vs Wild]

A.B.S.R.D. [Articles By Some Real Deals]

- There are no words I can think of that accurately describe how this article made me feel. It's horrific, beautiful, and human. "My Long War" by Dexter Filkins. [@nytimes]

- What can I say? I'm a sucker for photo essays; especially ones from the Olympics. This one has a photos of the different tattoos Olympians are sporting nowadays. It's nice to see more than just the typical five colored rings of the Olympic games. However, I think there is a serious lack of athletes with stars that happen to be on the inside of their right ankles. JUST SAYING. [@time]

- Like I said, I'm a real sucker. This Olympic photo essay documents the highs and lows of the games. [@time]

- On Saturday, presidential hopeful Senator Barack Obama found a vice president in the likes of Senator Joe Biden of Deleware. As a first time voter, I figured it was best to look into the other man I will be voting for in November. [@salon]

- The title alone was enough to cause a double take. A remote.. in your mouth.. controlled by your tongue?? "Study: Tongues to Control Devices" [@time]

- Finally, and most importantly [!!!], the US Open starts today!! Holla! Obvs I'll be tracking my faves aka Roger Federer, Ana Ivanovic, Rafael Nadal, Gael Monfils, Venus and Serena Williams, etc. [@usopen]

Monsoons are EXTREME.

rah-ful-mao BD
22-08-2008

A.B.S.R.D. [Afternoon Bundle of Some Reading I Did]

- Don't get me wrong, I have a great amount of respect for what Michael Phelps did at the Olympics but what Usain Bolt is doing absolutely INCREDIBLE. I realize I have a huge bias when it comes to swimming vs track, but you have to admit that it is much more difficult to break track records than swimming records. Just look at the stats: 25 swimming WRs were broken at the Olympics alone compared to the 7 track WRs broken all year. [@time]

- "'I don't want to go to school,' Bolduc told his parents, the crushing reality of his situation having yet to fully dawn on his naïve consciousness. 'I want to play outside with my friends.'" Me too, Connor, me too.. [@theonion]

- All I know is that I never want to become nostalgic about $4/gal for gas. I also know that conspiracy theories are interesting. Are oil prices rigged? You tell me.

I blame this post on my obsession with Google Reader

rah-ful-mao BD
[21-08-2008]

A.B.S.R.D [All 'Bout Stuff I Read Daily]

- Microsoft launched their new photo program Photosynth today. While I'm still unsure what it's used for, it looks like a really neat program. Unfortunately, according to the website, "Photosynth is a little overwhelmed" right now so I'm not able to make a synth of my desk. Once it's up and running again, I'll be sure to post an example of it. [@pcmag; @photosynth]

- American Airlines started their "sky-high wi-fi" services yesterday finally giving passengers a reason to bother with their laptops while flying. Howevs, I think they'd have a lot more success if the service was free. Nickel and diming your passengers is not the way to get more business. [@technewsworld]

- I find it's sometimes best to forget the one thing I learned in statistics - "correlation does not imply causation." Maybe it's because I'm a Yankee/liberal/Chicagoan but I loved this article. PS - I have a/c but it's not like I really need it. [@salon]

This is one of those times where I follow through with something.

Alright. Remember that one time where I said I'd put up an example of my custom comics?

No? That's ok, I forgot too. ANYWAY, my scanner's working and I have a comic for you! HOLLA!

[if you can't tell, it's a squirrel and he's found a giant acorn.]
[comment if you'd like a comic drawn JUST FOR YOU!]

AH! I actually have things I to blog about. I don't have time right now to write all of it out. It will come soon enough I promise! [It's in my draft folder]

For now, read what I read!

- I still don't understand why this Lennart Green had a TEDTalk or how he did what he did, but this guy is ACE. If anything, I learned how to turn my hand over without moving my wrist.. [@ted]
- Congrats to Rashid Ramzi in the 1500m run for not only winning the first medal for his country [Bahrain] but for making it a gold! [@nytimes]
- For John McCain, "alternative energy" is only one word and it has four letters. [@time]
- I'll admit I never watch any of the cable news networks but I have to give props to MSNBC for giving Rachel Maddow her own show. It's great to see a woman making it out there with the "big boys." [@nytimes]
- Lower the drinking age to stop binge drinking? I think university administrators should consider other alternatives before signing on to the "Amethyst Initiative." Watch the discussion between Amethyst Initiative founder Dr. John McCardell and National President of M.A.D.D. Laura Dean-Mooney that aired on The Early Show on CBS here. [@necn; @csmonitor; @youtube]

rah-ful-mao

i've been trying to find a reason for this blog. i don't know what it is supposed to be for me. is it a journal? is it a storage place for things i find interesting? is it just a jumble of everything it could possibly be? while i'd love for it to be a place i write, more often than not, i have nothing to say.

so i've come to a temporary conclusion: i will provide a service.

while i'm not a comic genius or a brilliant artist, i like to doodle. animals, robots, food, you name it and i'll try my best to draw it. because my abilities are limited, i keep it simple. the best description i can provide for my work is: one panel comic. i draw animals with BIG eyes. i draw puns [e.g. food fight]. i draw whatever it is that you want me to draw.

i figure this will eventually lead to me discovering what the heck it is i want to do here.

if you'd like to request a doodle, just comment.

i'll post some examples once the geek squad returns my scanner.

1-800-INTERNET

I'm not one to complain out loud. I don't like face-to-face or voice-to-voice confrontation. It unnerves me and forces me to think on my toes. I have one chance to say what I need to say. When it comes to any minor issue I just sit behind my computer screen and immerse myself in the simplicity* of the internet and written word. It gives me time to think, edit, delete, wait, and disappear. But right now, I'm on a medication that heightens my emotions. It makes me bold, irritable, and somewhat passive-aggressive. So when I saw the new facebook format, I felt it best to send them some feedback.

"Oh facebook. There are so many things that I love about you. You allow me to live vicariously through the internet. I'm not sure if you're aware, but you're actually real life. It's true. Nothing is real or concrete without it being real or concrete on facebook first. For the most part, I've been pleased with the way you work. Sure, there was that uproar when you opened your doors to more than just college and high school students. The news feed was a little unsettling when it first appeared on our homepages. Despite it all, we still loved you so much. We learned to accept your flaws. We convinced ourselves that you just wanted to share the joy with new demographics and help us keep tabs on people we'd forgotten about on this world wide web.

But facebook, this new format, this isn't a little change. This is a big change. Frankly, I'm unimpressed. I'm unimpressed to the point that I am taking time out my life to write to you. There are so many things that I do not like about this new format that I feel it most appropriate to simply bullet point and make a slight commentary on each component.

The Homepage: Maybe it’s the minimalist in me, my desire to keeps things concise, my issue with wasted space but I was a fan of the skinny sidebars and the compact news feed. I was a fan of the thin gray lines that bordered everything. It assured me that you were under control – that you had boundaries, limitations, etc. Now I feel like something is missing [re: left-hand sidebar] and it’s been replaced with an unacceptable amount of white space between text and images.

The Profile [Tab Navigation]: The thing about the old facebook profile is that it was simple. You went to the page and everything you wanted to know was right there in front of you. It allowed you to learn about somebody without feeling too invasive. I understand that you think we go to other people’s profiles so we can write on their walls. For the most part, that holds true. However, it is not the only reason. After we’ve commented, it’s nice to just browse. I scroll down, I scroll up, and I’m done and satisfied. Clicking tabs is a nuisance. It’s profile browsing with a purpose and whether you like it or not, on facebook, there is no purpose. When I click on a tab to get to a specific location, I feel lazy. I know it’s on the page, I can find it myself. I’m a big kid now! Facebook says so.

The Wall: Walls are for writing. Walls are not for “stories.” This is why we have a news feed.

The News Feed: Ok, I get it. Bobby Teenager is now friends with Mary Adolescent. How do I know this? I saw it on the news feed on my homepage. But facebook, you have my back. In case I forget, you have it right there for me in the middle of Bobby Teenager’s wall. It’s a good thing Bobby can’t get rid of the news feed on his wall either, otherwise I’d have to go back to my homepage to see whose wall he wrote on or if he discussed something on the “i ♥ The Office" group. Thank goodness you did that because for a minute there I almost completely forgot that I don't care. But I do care - I care so, so much.

The Boxes: I do not like applications. I think they’re annoying, overused, and eventually neglected so when I actually add an application, I want it to be seen. You’ve gone and packed away all my applications into a little box. Granted, I’m actually glad my profile isn’t as cluttered but I want the ability to get my LOLcats back on there. I don’t think you realize how many clicks I made to find the right one.

Facebook, you’ve turned my cyber-world upside down. I do love you. I’m just glad you gave me a button to take me back home."